


May I Love You

by atypical



Category: Atypical (TV 2017)
Genre: Cazzie Winter Formal AU, F/F, Pining, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-23
Updated: 2018-12-23
Packaged: 2019-09-25 09:24:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17118698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/atypical/pseuds/atypical
Summary: Here's a thing or two about the laws of the universe: opposites attract, objects in motion will stay in motion unless a force is acted upon and lastly, Casey and Izzie are, believe it or not, destined to be there for each other.orThe cazzie winter formal au where Casey asks for Izzie's help because she has no idea what to do. There's dancing and pining and everything else in between.





	May I Love You

The way Casey sees it, she could use a miracle. Now, this isn't the kind of thing she'd ask for on a plain Tuesday night but she's kind of desperate. The thing about fancy private schools is that there are formal parties where students rent limos for their rides. Actually, they can't rent them if they really have their own. Classic Clayton Prep bullshit.

 

So she calls Izzie because she's helpless and maybe a tiny part of her heart misses the girl already even though they literally just saw each other in class. And if anyone can help her, it's Izzie, the girl she didn't expect to suddenly be her everything.

 

(She didn't just say that because she has a boyfriend.)

 

Everything about Izzie exuded confidence, strength and beauty. She always had this sassy demeanor that instantly intimidates anyone that doesn't know her. But now Casey understands why she's so closed off and harsh at times and she's glad that Izzie has finally let her in. 

 

She wonders how often that happens. 

 

Casey never really expected that they would have more things in common than she had originally thought. There's this instant chemistry. Some would call it a spark or the start of something that is unstoppable. It isn’t forced… it’s just there. 

Here's a thing or two about the laws of the universe: opposites attract, objects in motion will stay in motion unless a force is acted upon and lastly, Casey and Izzie are, believe it or not, destined to be there for each other. What they have can be called by many names. But they're all very much the same things. This is the inescapable creation of something beautiful but of course, they don't realize it. What they have is a quiet phenomenon, something that is still growing and blossoming and besides they don't have to fit all puzzle pieces together yet.

 

(Not when it's already whole.) 

 

Fifteen minutes later, she hears the doorbell ring. 

 

"I got it!" 

 

"Don't yell!" Sam scolds her. "The penguins!" 

 

Casey beams of happiness and excitement, almost falling off the stairs as she clumsily made her way to the door. She pauses, gathers her breath for a second and then she grabbed the doorknob with a sheepish grin. 

 

"Hey Newton." Izzie says with a bright smile on her face.

 

"Hey." Casey returns the enthusiasm and leans forward for a hug. 

 

"What is that?" She asks as soon as she retreats from Izzie's warmth.

 

"We made too many cookies." She replies with a bashful smile. 

 

"Well, this might be my lucky day after all." 

 

•••••

 

So here's the deal. Izzie's hands are sort of shaking but not from the cold. Casey takes the cookies from her and grabs her hand as they went upstairs. 

 

"So I figured Evan's your date for the winter formal?" Izzie asks, not quite certain why she's asking a question she already knows the answer to.

 

"Yeah, he hates it but he loves me." 

 

"Hmm awesome." 

 

"What about you? Who’s your date?"

 

"Nonexistent. Nate's an ass and I deserve someone better so we can both forget the idea of a prom date for me." 

 

"I'm really sorry about that." 

 

"Don't be. Besides at least I can help you. I'm all yours if I may say so." Izzie's really trying to keep it friendly but her words slip off of her mouth faster than she can control them. 

 

"Thanks. I figured we can go dress shopping first? You've been through this so what kind of dresses do the stuck up people on Clayton wear? I've always imagined ball gowns and stuff. The Cinderella kind of thing, you know." 

 

Izzie dissolves into laughter. Casey blushes a bit.

 

"Nope. I mean it's fancy but not that fancy. Although you would look good in a ball gown. Like a princess." 

 

Casey gives her a cheeky smile and a side hug. 

 

"So tomorrow?" 

 

"Meet me at the mall?"

 

"Screw that, I can pick you up. We can go together." 

 

"It's a date then" Izzie says without thinking any better of it but Casey laughs.

 

"Right. I actually just wanna see your siblings and thank them for the cookies."

 

They dissolve into laughter. Casey asks Izzie if she wants to watch a movie with her. She says yes and if she's snuggling close to Casey five minutes into the horror movie Casey chose, it's definitely not because she's scared.

 

•••••

 

Casey stayed true to her word and picks Izzie up from her grandma's house. Her siblings were nothing but amazing. 

 

"Try not to burn the house down again!" 

 

"Again?" Casey mutters. She waves goodbye at the two figures on the porch, one of them holding a baby. Izzie jogs to the car and settles in her seat. 

 

"Are we all set?" 

 

They go dress shopping first. Izzie discovers how much of an indecisive person Casey is when it comes to picking an item. But she stays patient, finding it cute whenever Casey would do a little silly dance and then pout the next second in front of the mirror. 

 

"How do I look?" 

 

"Gorgeous." 

 

"You're just saying that cause you're my best friend." 

 

"But it's the truth." Izzie defends herself. She rummages through the selection on the closet until she lays her eyes on the most stunning black lacy dress she has ever seen. 

 

"What's that?" 

 

"Here, try this on. I have a good feeling that this would look pretty on you." 

 

Casey givers her a soft smile. And it's not like Izzie's brain to haywire like that but whatever. Casey takes the dress off of her hands and she sits down on the fancy mall sofa and waits.

 

"Hey Iz, I-I need your help with the zipper." 

 

_And oh dear god._

 

She opens the door and sees Casey struggling. 

 

_Cute. No. Yes. Wait-_

 

“Here let me get that.” She offers a sympathetic smile. Izzie touches Casey’s shoulder so she can turn her back to her. Her hand nervously fidgets on the slider. Her breath is shaky but it does not show. She composes herself better this time, at least she tries to. Casey is quiet as she stares at their reflection on the mirror and if she notices the way Izzie softly smiles, flustered and all as she zips the dress up, she doesn’t say anything. 

 

“There you go, princess.” 

 

Casey likes her new nickname. 

 

“Thanks.” She turns to the mirror. “Do I look good? Is this too much?” Before Izzie says something, she rests her hands on Casey’s waist ever so lightly, the touch just hovers, careful to not cross any line. But maybe there is an unknown line that is being crossed the moment an Ed Sheeran song plays through the store’s speakers and Casey’s back is lightly pressed on her chest. They do not move for a second and it’s fine they think. Best friends appreciate each other like this. 

 

“You look perfect.” 

 

But then there’s a sudden ring on Casey’s phone with Evan’s name flashing on the screen. And Izzie believes there isn’t any more perfect metaphor for a reality check than that. 

 

•••••

Anyone who has a perfect 20/20 vison can see that Casey cannot dance even if her life depended on it. It’s a major problem because she doesn’t know crap about slow dancing. Izzie told her about a cotillion dance which if she hears again one more time she might need to learn how to spell it. 

 

She starts clearing some space in her bedroom but now that she’s finished she doesn’t know what else to do and if she doesn’t keep her mind occupied, she starts overthinking of things she shouldn’t. 

 

Suddenly there’s a knock on her door. 

 

“Oh hey Sam, do you need anything?” 

 

“Izzie’s coming right?” 

 

“Yeah and?”

 

“Nothing. The cookies she brought were amazing. Tell me if she brings more.” Casey chuckles at that.

 

“Will do.” 

 

Sam closes the door and Casey waits. The doorbell rings and she hears her mom letting Izzie inside the house. 

 

“Newton.” Izzie greets her with cheery tone.

 

“Hey. Glad you can make it.”

 

“Yeah, today’s the first snowy day this season and my siblings wanted me to play with them for a while. So sorry if I’m late.” 

 

“I should be the one to apologize. I’m sure that I’m going to be a pain in ass when it comes to dancing lessons. So please bear with my skills.” 

 

And so Izzie sets the instrumental music from her phone.

 

“Fancy.” 

 

“Well it’s Clayton. What can I say, the school’s dramatic.” 

 

“I’m going to lead. So put your right hand on my left hand and then rest your left hand on my shoulder.” Casey seems to forget the difference of left from right with the proximity of Izzie’s face on hers. 

 

“Got it?” 

 

“Y-yeah.” 

 

Izzie places her left hand gently on Casey’s hips and she could feel a slight shiver. She locks her gaze with Casey who smiles delicately at her. 

 

“Try not to step on my foot.” Izzie jokes as she tries to lighten the mood.

 

This is just dancing for goodness sake. 

 

“I would forehead promise you on that but I know I’ll just break it.” 

 

Izzie hums. They start to move. She instructs Casey carefully. The other girl should give herself more credit than she believes she deserves. Casey’s a fast learner. 

 

They don’t talk. None of them dared to ruin whatever this is. Both of them are shy yet silently courageous. Casey starts to wonder if this is what it would feel like to dance with Evan. If it’s as nerve wracking and amazing as this is. Would he be as gentle as Izzie? As kind and as softhearted? For some reason, she doesn’t think so. This moment is Izzie and hers. And by knowing just that, she realizes that nothing could ever compare. That’s when the butterflies sets in. There’s a lump in her throat whenever their eyes meet.

 

Izzie’s starting to dance slower so Casey can have the proper time to catch up but in an unexpected turn of events, Casey draws herself closer to Izzie and spun her around. She had always wanted to that. And she’s so close, Izzie thinks, still slightly jolted from Casey’s action. So close that a slight movement would augment their friendship if acted upon. 

 

And so Izzie pulls away, but not without a genuine smile that says that she enjoyed the night and that she would love to dance more but she remembers the ultimate reality that hangs in the air. 

 

Casey’s not hers. It’s as simple as that. And that doing all this is just making it harder for her. 

 

She bids her good night and if Casey wonders what her siblings might even need at 11 p.m. she doesn’t ask. Because deep inside her, she knows and her emotions are starting to pile up like bricks on her chest, making it harder for her to breathe.

 

•••••

 

When Casey overthinks, she spirals until one single thought consumes her. Evan deserves better. He’s kind, he’s sweet and he has done nothing wrong to Casey. And she hates herself knowing she’ll be hurting him. But at the same time, she’s a young girl trying to figure out herself. And though firsts aren’t your forever, they do not deserve a heart break. 

 

Casey decides to tell Evan what she has mostly figured out herself. She calls him and soon he’s pulling up in front of her house. He sits at the hood of his car and Casey joins him.

 

“I need to tell you something.” 

 

It starts from there and Casey tells Evan how she needs time and space to figure out this new part of her that she’s just discovering. Evan’s confused but still kind and understanding because he loves Casey, he truly does and he knows his love comes with acceptance. And it hurts, there is no denying that. In fact, a part of him subconsciously knows. 

 

The way Casey would talk about Izzie is enough evidence even though she’s not saying anything about her at this moment.

 

“How are you so kind to me? You should be running away.” Casey asks, a bit teary eyed.

 

“If I recall correctly, you’re the athlete here. And I might need some time and space too but this took a lot of courage to say and I’m not just going to run away when you’re vulnerable. I care about you. A lot. But I’m glad you’re being honest with yourself…and with me.”

 

“Thank you. God I-I’m really sorry Evan.” 

 

Evan smiles half-heartedly and tells her he needs to go. Casey doesn’t put up a fight and lets him. 

 

•••••

 

“Christmas is so close, I can almost smell the mistletoe I know I’m never going to get kissed under.” 

 

“That’s bitter.” 

 

“Shut up Sam. I’m wallowing.

 

“You shut up. Is this what lack of relationship does to a person? When is Izzie coming back. She promised me cookies the last time she was here.”

 

“You can forget all about that Sam.”

 

“Why? Did you guys had a fight?” 

 

“Nope.” 

 

“So when is she coming back?”

 

“I don’t know Sam.” 

 

“Okay, but tell me if she’s visiting. She’s really cool and-“

 

“I broke up with Evan.” Casey cuts him off. 

 

“Okay. Do you want to tell me why?” 

 

“I want to but I don’t know how to start. Is it okay if I just need your company for now?” 

 

Sam stays silent, gets off of the couch and grabs his laptop from the kitchen. He comes back, sits next to Casey and opens a tab to look up penguins videos. He takes out his earphones from pocket and shared the left one to Casey. They stay silent for a while, both intently waiting for a penguin egg to hatch. Casey rests his head on Sam’s shoulder. He could feel Casey’s tears but he doesn’t say anything.

 

•••••

 

“Newton!” Izzie catches up to her on the field, hair up in a ponytail. Casey doesn’t stop. Instead, she continues running away from Izzie and their conversation. 

 

“Hey, what’s up? You’ve missed a few classes.” 

 

“Nothing. I’m just catching up on training.”

 

“You’re the last person on earth that needs training.”

 

And then Casey stops running, trying to catch her breath even though it feels like Izzie’s taking all oxygen away. 

 

“You can talk to me.” Izzie assures her.

 

“I-I just need some space.” Casey says through her ragged breathing.

 

“Space? From- from what? From me?” Izzie says, voice cracking. She takes Casey’s silence as a yes and this is when it hits her. She wonders if she actually crossed a line and made Casey uncomfortable and that this is all of her fault. 

 

“Why? Did I do something?” 

 

“It’s more about what I’ve done.”

 

“Best friends tell each other everything Newton.” A small trace of frustration flickers in Izzie’s eyes.

 

“It’s nothing.”

 

_Lie._

 

“You are obviously not okay. Do you not trust me?” 

 

And here’s the thing. Maybe this would have been easier if Casey felt nothing for the other girl, if she didn’t think about her all the time or if she didn’t care what she did when she’s not with her. But it’s too late now. And she wants to say something but she has just broken it off with Evan and she doesn’t want to move forward so fast. Maybe it starts with honesty. She has done so with Evan so what’s the difference with Izzie? 

 

“I broke up with Evan.” She finally says as she let out the breath she has been holding out for so long. 

 

Izzie can’t find the words to say and then she does.

 

“Oh Casey. I’m sorry.” 

 

Casey didn’t break down or cry. She just sat at the side of the track and Izzie sat next to her. Silence envelopes the air once again. A lot of unspoken words are going around and Izzie ponders whether these words that aren’t spoken are words that don’t matter. 

 

“I really loved him.” 

 

Izzie nods, “I know you did.” 

 

For the first time, Casey understand what she means when she said that. She loved Evan but she wasn’t in love with him. Somehow that made it all clearer than a blue sky in a warm sunny day. They don’t notice it but this is the great shift. The one that augmented their friendship now that the other person has acted upon it. 

 

And it feels so right.

 

•••••

 

Dateless and all, they still decided to go that fancy winter formal. If it had not been a requirement then Casey would’ve most likely spent her evening binge watching Supergirl because let’s face it, she can never get enough of Lena Luthor. 

 

Casey tells her family that Izzie is picking her up tonight and no, she is not her date so they can all stop giggling now. 

 

The doorbell rings and Sam opens the door. 

 

“Hi Izzie.” 

 

“Sam.” The girl smiles brightly. “I got you your cookies. My siblings and I made extra so everyone can have some.” 

 

“Bold of you to assume that I’m sharing.” Sam says and Izzie laughs. 

 

Izzie comes inside the Gardner’s home and sees Casey waiting for her in the living room in her beautiful black lacy dress the she picked out for her. This is like a scene in one of those movies where the date (Casey’s not her date) for your prom looks like a literal goddess with her perfect hair, plump lips and defined jawline and everything’s in slow motion but your heartbeat’s on fast forward. Izzie is utterly in awe because how can someone look this beautiful. 

 

She looks at Casey and forgets how to breathe for how lovely she is. 

 

Casey greets her with a shy “hello”. 

 

“You look beautiful.” Casey compliments Izzie and the world stops spinning. 

 

“Thank you. You look beautiful as well. Really beautiful. Like an angel- oh my god what am I saying.” Izzie rambles, whole-heartedly laughing and Casey’s just staring at her, words caught up in her throat. 

 

“Let’s take a picture! Come on girls!” Her mom says and they reluctantly placed themselves in front of the fireplace and posed for their pictures. And if Elsa sees a shot of Casey looking at Izzie lovingly while Izzie has her eyes closed, she doesn’t say anything because finally, Casey followed her heart.

 

•••••

Everyone’s already on the dance floor. Casey wants to ask Izzie to dance with her but she isn’t sure if it’s the right time to do so. But her internal battle dissipates as soon as Izzie approaches her with a sly grin on her face. Casey feels her cheeks flush and she’s glad that the dim lighting hides it. 

 

“May I have this dance, princess?” Izzie asks, raising her eyebrow playfully. 

 

Casey takes her hand, interlocking their fingers just like they did the night they drove four towns away for a cotton candy Slurpee. 

 

The move somewhere in the middle. Casey loosely wraps her arms around Izzie’s neck and Izzie rests her hands on Casey’s hips, swaying slowly to the rhythm of the music. Izzie leans in, her forehead touching Casey’s as if they’re both making a silent promise that only they know. 

 

And if Casey’s being honest, she has been wondering how Izzie’s lips feel like. They’re so close that their breathing becomes one. Izzie feels like she knows what Casey’s thinking. They’re both tempted to make the first move but they are also both hesitant. But Casey figures they’ve crossed so many lines anyway and so her trembling fingers touches Izzie’s neck and she can feel the other girl tense up. Her touch is light, uncertain and inquiring. Izzie meets her longing gaze and she takes this as permission to go on. She leans closer, lips hovering over Izzie’s but not yet touching. She finally closes the gap, gently pressing their lips together. 

 

And _oh._

 

Casey pauses, tentatively asking for Izzie to kiss her back and she does. The kiss is sweet and beautiful. They do so for a few more seconds until they both slow down together. Casey pulls back and her heart hasn’t been this happy at the sight of someone else’s smile.

 

The next time Casey talk about things that feel right, this will be the first thought in her head. Izzie and her slow dancing to a song they haven’t heard before. And they both looked so beautiful and no one in this world can touch them. They radiate with inexplicable happiness with the knowing that Casey’s heart is Izzie’s and Izzie’s heart belongs to Casey. And how does it feel more right than this?


End file.
